A Mindful Analysis of the Repercussions of Carrying a 200 lb. Head on your Neck

Ok. Yeah. I have a cold. Is it the end of the world? With all the strife and disease and ugliness in the world, who cares?

Nobody.

But nonetheless, as I sat in My Chair (which I capitalize because I want you to realize the importance of this piece of furniture to me), with my feet on the ottoman and with my beloved quilt upon me (regardless of the fact that it is 85 degrees outside),and held my heavy, hot head in my hands, I found it necessary to analyze my circumstances.

Fact #1: I do not have the strength to get out of My Chair. (Except for the mitigating factor that results from drinking boatloads of tea)

Fact #2: If (when) you read My Book, you will read a Noticing entitled “I am in Great Danger”. This is about the humongous pile of books and other reading material on my bedside table. So I have a lot of reading that I really should tackle.

Fact #3: Generally I run around like a lunatic all day and don’t read much. In fact, I feel guilty when I sit down and read a book, unless it is something directly related to my work. Yes, I am a complete idiot.

Fact #4: I began to realize that colds are made for reading, just like boots are made for walking (if you are old enough to get that musical reference).

Fact #5: When I want to truly relax I read the catalogues sent to me from stores. My favorite is Neiman Marcus, which for those who aren’t familiar, is the nickname of the store really named Needless Markup. Now I could confess to many sins, but coveting isn’t really one of them. I have absolutely no desire to own a $1,500 handbag, so the Needless Markup catalogue is just an interesting anthropological adventure. (See how I make wasting time seem like something important so I don’t have to feel guilty about it?) Yes, I am a complete idiot. Oops. Being repetitious here.

Anyway, I put all these facts together and came to the conclusion that I should read! So in the past two days I have read two NM catalogues and a Pottery Barn.

But also I read The Power of Mindful Learning by Ellen Langer – she is the foremost mindfulness guru around. If you really want to learn about mindfulness, read her stuff. I mean, after you read My Book. Dr. Langer is a Harvard professor; I am a NM catalogue reader. But still.

And I read Corporate Sponsorships in 3 Easy Steps by Linda Hollander. I read this because I want to get corporate sponsors for The Did Ya Notice? Project. Now I know something about sponsors from some of my previous work lives, and I can tell you this: Linda’s book is spot on and very helpful. However, “3” is really 3 with lots of substeps. “Easy” is in the eye of the beholder. Maybe it’s easy after you’re done but certainly not while you’re doing it. “Steps” is more like an ancient staircase leading to the ramparts. You might want to climb it on your hands and knees like I did in Greece. Actually though, really this is a great book and Linda is lovely. So if you are interested for your organization, buy her book.

And I read the summer issue of Harvard Business Review. I love this journal. I always find something interesting and useful, and it makes me feel Smart. There is a column in this one by a cranky woman who does not like all this research and proselytizing about happiness. Bah humbug, says she. Well, maybe she’s right. Too much of anything is no good, as my mother used to say.

Then I read Speaker magazine which is the magazine of the National Speakers Association. It made me feel inadequate. Why aren’t I yet jetting around the world speaking to thousands of people? By the way, the other week I attended the National Speakers Association annual conference. This was a great conference - the information presented was extremely useful and the speakers were incredibly inspiring. But…I hated it. Did you know I am a closet introvert? I was put into a hell of 1,500 screaming extroverts carousing with each other. Fortunately I found a rock to crawl under.

After all that, I needed to study the Crate and Barrel catalogue.

But tomorrow is another day and if I am still sick, I believe I will gather up my courage and read a Real Book – not work related!  

Do you have any encouragement for a complete idiot like me? Will you give me dispensation to read such a thing: A Real Book?

©2015 Margery Leveen Sher

The Noticer’s Guide to Living and Laughing…..Change Your Life Without Changing Your Routine is now available on Amazon, Nook, and iTunes.  Read the reviews and purchase here. http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00OZTM73U 

MARGERY IS AVAILABLE TO KEYNOTE YOUR MEETING OR CONFERENCE with a motivational talk filled with both startling wisdom and humongous laughs:

“Notice What You See and Be a Hero at Work”